High class embarassment

Today I attended a mandatory "New Members Seminar" for the American Club. (We cannot become official members until we attended said seminar). I wound up at a table with some other women who I met while living in our temporary apartment. I was by far the youngest woman at the table (I was sitting at the table listed for "Those with children older than 10"). I was also by far, the least wealthy person at the table. They drive luxury cars (in Singapore), wear designer clothes, and spent a better part of the conversation discussing what to do for Spring Break. The most well received idea was skiing in the mountains of Japan.  Needless to say, a bit out of my league.

Well, I wound up mentioning the "Oil Wives Club". One of the other women is married to an oil guy and she and I were talking about joining the club. I said that if I joined,  I should start wearing a cowboy hat and spurs.  Another woman cracked a joke about Texas wives and I gave a giggle. However, my giggle resulted in my swallowing down the wrong tube. Within seconds I was wheezing, gasping, coughing, and crying. I looked like a freaking psycho. All the other women paused in mid conversation to see what was wrong with me. "Can you breath?" "Are you okay?" Of course I was okay, I just couldn't express that sentiment at the moment. After about three minutes I was finally able to speak again....except my voice was extremely shaky (I could only get out about 3 words at a time) and I still had tears running down my face. Needless to say, I am sure I made a great impression at my table of socialites.

After my humiliation at the club, I went to buy a toaster and a blow dryer; two things I have been desperately missing the past couple of weeks. I am accustomed to walking into Target, going down the appropriate isle, and choosing an appliance that seems to best fit my needs for the most reasonable price. For some reason, a salesman decided to permanently attach himself to my side and follow me through the entire store. I was hoping to lose him by the time I made it to the blow-dryers, but no luck. Instead he was plugging in every dryer to show me how it worked. If I decided on one, he would want to show me another, and all it's fascinating air blowing features. I have never been so stressed out trying to by a hairdryer in my life. 

Onto other news.....

This weekend was very fun. We went to Andrew's school carnival on Saturday. The boys had a great time jumping in the bouncy things, and Scott had an even better time waiting in line for 30 minutes to buy lunch. It looked like he was waiting to get into a soup kitchen. After we ate our $6 hamburgers (that was with no cheese and no toppings) the boys went down to the basketball court. I think that is where they had the most fun. Jacob was sword fighting with a ballon sword he had made (Andrew's had already popped) and Andrew just sprinted around the court. I have never see two kids expend so much energy and still be awake and ready to go at the end of it.

After the carnival, Scott took me to a local nursery to get me my Valentine's present. (He tried to accomplish this on Valentine's Day, but the nursery was closing by the time we got there). We bought five new plants for the apartment and I am in love with all of them. We now have three potted bugenvilla on the balcony, a large, flowering tree of some sort in our entry way, and an enormous orchid (which hangs out with me in the kitchen).  At the nursery there was a smallish Buddhist temple, which the boys found fascinating. Jacob in particular. He wanted to know all about the religion and Buddha.  For some reason, he thought Buddha was "buddhist" (which I guess he technically is) so every time he saw a buddha he would shout, "I see another Buddhist!" I kept trying to tell him it's just called a buddha, but he kept saying the buddhist thing. Another great expat moment - a blonde kid running around a predominantly buddhist country shouting out, "I see another buddhist!" Not that we Americans label or anything.....

Sunday was interesting....for a couple of reasons.

Reason #1 -

 Scott and I happened to be asked to give the opening and closing prayer at church. After sacrament, I am bending down, gathering all the boys' crayons and nick-nacks, when I hear someone say, "Now these aren't the Barlows I know!" I look up to see Renee's (my sister-in-law's) uncle standing there. It was so neat to see a familiar face. He said he did not know we were there and was surprised to see us get up to offer the prayers. We offered him a ride home after church, and subsequently extended the invitation to dinner. It was really fun to visit with him.

Reason #2 - The bishop told me that he wanted to offer me a calling and to meet in his office after church. For some reason I was really anxious about what calling I would get. Anyway, when we opened the door to his office I exclaimed, "Bring it on!" I have no idea why I said that, or what he thought, but I felt kind of dumb immediately afterwards. Well, we sit down and just as we are about to start our conversation, the executive secretary walks in to turn over all his church things (he is moving out of the country). After he leaves, the bishop goes on a five minute speech about what a wonderful job Jan did as his executive secretary. Just as I am beginning to wonder why he he telling me this, and worrying that Uncle Bob is stuck waiting for me to wrap up, I hear the bishop say, "Brother Barlow will be his successor. How do you feel about that?" What do I feel about that!? I think that's insane! I think that is ridiculous - seeing as we just got here and Scott is still trying to get his bearings at work. That's what I think! Instead it came out, "I know Scott will do a great job and I will support him in any way I can." 

Oh, and by the way, I am in nursery until the summer.